Since it's Tuesday and all, I decided to check AmericanGreetings.com again. Today happens to be Floral Design Day. I'm not sure of the best way to make fun of this. Seriously, they only had to come up with 365 things and one of them is in appreciation of Floral Designs. The e-card says "Remember to stop and arrange the roses." Right.

So that you don't think that I'm all talk, I've decided to come up with some meaningful things to celebrate. My first inclination is to make a list of 365 things that would be way better than Floral Design Day, but I have to remind myself I'm in law school and really don't have time for that. So, here's 10 things for which I'd like to set aside a day.

10. Fiji bottled water Day - you gotta love that natural Artesian water that comes from springs thousands of miles away from industrial pollution (or so they say)

9. Sauteed Onions Day - I don't care what you're cooking, sauteed onions really liven things up.

8. Spanish Language Day - check the blog tomorrow

7. Protein Shake Day - there's nothing like getting all the protein you need from a drink

6. Johnny Lingo Day - we all need to believe in ourselves (see yesterday's post)

5. Seinfeld Day - I think we'd all agree

4. Lord of the Rings Trilogy Day - since it would take almost a whole day to watch the extended edition trilogy, I think it's very appropriate, and I love that Samwise Gamgee

3. Animal Cracker Day - I'll eat anything that's in the shape of animals, letters, or people

2. Toilet Paper Day - it's #2 for a good reason

1. Punter Day - professional punters deserve a lot more credit than they get, and it's my dream job

And, with that said, happy Floral Design Day.

I didn't want to post again because I didn't want to push down my Office Space post, but I figure I have to post again sometime, so it might as well be now. I just read a blurb on MSNBC about a soccer team that traded a player in exchange for 33 lbs. of meat. This reminds of me something that probably isn't relevant at all.

In 10th grade health class, we had to watch the movie Johnny Lingo for some reason. I'm not going to summarize the movie (much). It was apparently produced by the church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints as tool used for teaching people about their value as humans. Actually, I think we had to watch this movie in health class at the same time we were learning about eating disorders.

The only reasons this movie has stuck with me since 10th grade are because it was incredibly cheesy and I enjoyed telling girls their value as approximated by the number of cows they would be worth. In the movie, Mahana turns out to be worth eight cows - which happened to be the largest number of cows ever offered for a bride on that particular island (which shocked everyone because Mahana was "ugly," or at least everyone thought she was until she realized her beauty when she was traded for eight cows).

Also, as luck would have it (?), Kim and I watched the movie on our honeymoon on the cruise ship. I don't know why Carnival Cruise Lines was playing this movie on the in-room televisions, but it worked out great because now Kim knows what I'm talking about when I call her a 10-cow woman. (thank goodness)

I also like to say she looks like a million crispy chicken nuggets, but that's totally irrelevant to this post.

Anyway, I feel bad for the soccer player because 33 lbs. of meat is way less than 1 full cow. I hope that doesn't make him feel less valuable as a person.

Looks like someone's got a case of the Mondays.

I'm headed over to Chotchky's for some shrimp poppers and extreme fajitas.

I guess that paragraph in Spanish took so much out of me that I needed 48 hours of recovery time. Apparently I'm all better.

In thinking about friendship, I decided to look up some Bible verses online. As it turns out, there's only 52 verses in the Bible that use the word "friend" (at least in the American Standard version, and I'm assuming the website is accurate). So, based on what I found, I've decided to play Spot the Fake Proverb!

The rules are as follows: one of the five phrases below isn't really from the book of Proverbs. Please no cheating, by either looking below or searching the Bible.

1. Wealth addeth many friends; But the poor is separated from his friend.
2. Many will entreat the favor of the liberal man; And every man is a friend to him that giveth gifts.
3. Faithful are the wounds of a friend; But the kisses of an enemy are profuse.
4. Whosoever therefore would be a friend of the world maketh himself an enemy of God.
5. A friend loveth at all times; And a brother is born for adversity.


Game Intermission Picture:


And the answers:

1. Proverbs 19:4 - Wealth addeth many friends; But the poor is separated from his friend.
2. Proverbs 19:6 - Many will entreat the favor of the liberal man; And every man is a friend to him that giveth gifts.
3. Proverbs 27:6 - Faithful are the wounds of a friend; But the kisses of an enemy are profuse.
4. James 4:4 - Whosoever therefore would be a friend of the world maketh himself an enemy of God.
5. Proverbs 17:17 - A friend loveth at all times; And a brother is born for adversity.

Yeah, you probably thought I was going to make up a proverb on my own and throw it in. I thought about it but I couldn't think of anything non-funny that wouldn't have been obvious. So, I hope you have enjoyed this round of Spot the Fake Proverb!

¡Feliz Miércoles! He pensado que miércoles es el día de español. No tengo razón por esto actividad, pero pienso que lo ayúdame con mis habilidades de la lengua de español. Yo reconoce que mis habilidades están muy insuficientes, ¡pero yo perseveraré! Yo disfruto la lengua de español y quiero que continuar a actualizar mi “blog” en español todos los miércoles. Así, otra vez, ¡feliz miércoles!

With that said, I'll also say that I won't write entirely in Spanish on Wednesdays. Also, for any of my hispanic readers, I'm sorry if I butchered your language...I'm really trying to get better. And, the below picture has absolutely nothing to do with this post, it's just a random picture I found in Google images and I think it's kind of funny.

Still thinking about the friendship thing. I'm sure I'll have something later today.

According to AmericanGreetings.com, February 21st is Pizza Delivery Day. Actually, every day is some kind of day according to American Greetings. It's hard to keep up with the schedule since every day is something new, but I feel like Tuesdays are good days to check out the site and see what's so special about today. Had I known last night that today was going to be Pizza Delivery Day, I would have woken up a much happier man this morning. That's really not true at all, I'm just trying to make it seem like today is special. I do wonder, however, if something as cheesy as American Greetings declaring today Pizza Delivery Day actually causes a spike in pizza deliveries. I'm going to call Papa John's later today and see if they have any comments.

Also, February is apparently Friendship month as well. I can only assume that this is another American Greetings ploy, but I think friendship is a good thing, so cheers to February and friendship. Writing about friendship makes me wonder about my "friendship skills" - those characteristics that make me a good friend, or the lack of those skills that make me a poor friend to have. For those of you who read my survey below, I've recently stated that I doubt that I'm a good friend.

Quite randomly, I'm reminded of a quote from Batman Begins (great movie, by the way, much better than the other Batman movies). "It's not who you are inside, but what you do that defines you."

I think that would apply very well to this whole friendship discussion. I feel that way because it really doesn't matter how much I enjoy another person's company or how great I feel about someone, my actions are really what defines the friendship. I realize that I have tons of "friends" to whom I probably don't show friendship - at least not as well as I could.

While recognizing these things, I don't really know what else to say or do about it. So, I'll keep you posted throughout the remaining days of February on my insights on friendship - however un-valuable they may be.

I would like to give a shout-out to JT for introducing me to StatCounter.com. The following things are most intriguing to me about my blog stats:

1. I have more visitors than I thought I did.

2. I have had two visitors from Spain (woohoo for Spain!)

3. And best of all, 61.5% of my visitors stay at my blog for less than 5 seconds.

So, thank you all for visiting my blog. If you're reading this right now, you've probably stayed more than 5 seconds, so you better hurry up and check out another site...might I suggest one of my links to the right.

Also, Kim has asked me to tweak my tone a bit as I write. I'm not exactly sure what she's talking about, but I will take this opportunity to apologize to Saddam Hussein for my lack of respect for his hunger strike (see below). Sorry man, best of luck at your trial.

Below are my responses to one of those e-mail surveys that comes around to my inbox every few months.

1a. What time is it: Saturday, February 18, 2006 at 3:59:27 PM
1b. Where do you live? Chapel Hill, NC
1c. Own or rent? Rent.

2. Name as it appears on birth certificate: nosnhoJ eeL leoJ (the other way around)

3. Nicknames: Jiggy, Out-of-Control Joel

4. Piercings: One that's closed up (seriously)

5. Most recent movie you've seen in the theater: Eight Below

6. Eye color: Blue or Green, changes with my mood

7. Place of birth: It's a secret.

8. Favorite foods: Sushi, Mexican, Chinese, Italian

9. Ever been to Africa? No

10. Ever been toilet papering? Yes.

11. Ever love someone so much it makes you cry? Sure.

12. Ever been in a car accident:? Only a couple minor ones; according to the insurance company, one of them was 10% my fault

13. Croutons or bacon bits:? Croutons - a salad isn't a salad without croutons.

14. Favorite day of the week:? Thursday because Friday is too close to the end of the weekend.

15. Favorite restaurant: Seki-Sui (Little Rock, AR), Mi Ranchito (Searcy, AR), Maggianos (Durham, NC), Kim Moon's (Indiana, PA)

16. Who do you wish to hear back from with their answers? Everyone, I guess.

17. Favorite sport to watch: Pro Football, College Basketball, Golf

18. Favorite drink: Dr. Pepper

19. Favorite dessert: Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough Ice Cream

20. Disney or Warner Brothers: Disney

21. Favorite Fast Food: Sheetz and Taco Bell

22. What color is your bedroom carpet: I haven't seen the carpet in 3 months.

23. How many times did you fail your driver's test: None.

24. Before this one, from whom did you get your last email: Kim. It's always Kim.

25. Which store would you choose to max out your credit card? Sheetz

26. What do you do most often when you are bored: Watch movies or Seinfeld on DVD.

27. Bedtime: When Kim goes to bed.

28. Who will respond to this e-mail the quickest? No one will be "quick"

29. Who is the person you sent this to that is least likely to
respond? I don't know to whom I'm sending it yet.

30. Who are you most curious about their responses to this? See answer to #29.

31. Favorite TV shows? Boston Legal - though I have issues with the way they make it seem like trials begin and end on the same day. Not to mention how many things they say in court to which there are no objections from the opposing counsel. But James Spader is awesome, so I enjoy the show.

32. Last person(s) you went to dinner with: Emily, Vadim, Lauren, Kati, Kim, Tim, Jason, and Korah (all together).

33. Ford or Chevy: Honda, Toyota, Lexus, or BMW

34. What are you listening to right now? The silence of the second floor of the law library. It gets scary down here. And when I say second floor, I mean about 50 yards higher than the top ring of hell.

35. What is your favorite color: Navy Blue (Kim copied me)

36. Lake, Ocean or river? The Ocean. It's powerful. But also scares the pee out of me.

37. How many tattoos do you have? A temporary Sponge Bob on my cheek (the other cheek...)

38. If you could have any job in the world, what would it be? Punter for the Pittsburgh Steelers.

39. What job would you not like? Most jobs.

40. Are you a good friend to have? Doubt it.

41. Do you have children? Heck no.

42. What are/will be their names? Maximus, Marti Jayne

43. Are you happy with where you are in life? For the most part.

44. Do you feel like you should still be in 7th grade even though you're really an "adult"? Of course.

A haiku:

hello there white snow
please stay a little while
hang out on my lawn

Thank you.

So this is a picture of some Pakistanis burning an effigy of George W. Bush as found on CNN.com. My first reaction to this picture was to look up 'effigy' on dictionary.com, finding the following: (1) A crude figure or dummy representing a hated person or group; (2) A likeness or image, especially of a person. This more or less confirmed the definition of effigy that I already had in mind, and so I have some comments.

First, this must qualify as a crude figure or dummy. Yet I take issue with that because the only crudeness about the dummy is that it looks nothing like Bush. If you're going to go through the trouble of making a dummy with two legs, two arms, a head, clothes, and a drawn face, why not try to make it look at least a little bit like the person intended? Seriously. If you want to burn something that looks like Bush, get a picture of the guy and burn that - don't waste a perfectfully good red shirt.

Second, last time I looked, Bush's face didn't look like a leopard.

Third, maybe you should step away from the burning dummy instead of trying to hold it up while it's on fire.

Something else that crossed my mind is that if they're really trying to be symbolic, why not burn an actual bush. I had only just thought of this when I realized that my not fly so well if they have any belief in the Old Testamant at all. I'm not up on my Islam, but I think they may be down with the OT. If so, a burning bush might be a bit sacrilegious...but surely not as bad as a cartoon.

While I don't really understand the whole Muslim culture, I'm not going to be totally insensitive to their feelings about the prophet Mohammed being depicted as a terrorist. I would have a problem with Jesus being depicted as something that he was not, especially something like a terrorist. However, most Christians I know wouldn't do what's being done in response to a cartoon published in some newspaper. Besides, if they're ticked because he was depicted as a terrorist, they're doing a real good job of shaking off that persona by burning things down and killing people.

Speaking of the Middle East, nothing says "screw you" like not eating, huh? Apparently Saddam Hussein and his cronies are on a hunger strike. I've never understood this. Do they think that this is really hurting anything? Is there anybody desperate for Saddam to eat lunch? Really? If I were the judge sitting over the Hussein trial, this is what I would say: "Whoop-dee-freaking-do, Saddam...you'll get hungry soon, trust me. If not, I guess you'll die."

If only I had had a blog when I was a child.

I hate coming so close, but not quite making it. That applies generally to just about everything and it especially applies to what happened to me this morning. So, Kim has been trying to win tickets to go see Seinfeld's stand-up in Raleigh. Apparently 94.7 QDR has been doing a trivia contest to qualify to win 4 tickets to go see him. Kim hasn't had much luck getting through the past few days (they have a new question everyday at 7:20 am) so she told me to listen this morning and to call in as soon as they started talking about Seinfeld. So, as soon as they started talking about the question, I called - this was before hearing the trivia question which happened to pertain to last night's episode of Seinfeld on Fox. Of course I didn't watch it, but I watch Seinfeld all the time on DVD and so I assumed I would know the answer.

Crap. I didn't know the answer. The question was: "On last night's episode with the Pez dispenser, what club did Kramer join?" I had no idea. However, I was already calling in and the phone was ringing, so I stayed on the phone just in case the answer hit me suddenly. After the phone rang about 20-30 times, it clicked over to the actual radio station so that I was hearing the radio through the phone. This was a good sign that something was about to happen, but I still didn't know the answer. As soon as the phone clicked over to the station I frantically began going through my Seinfeld DVDs looking for the episode summary to see if it said anything about the club Kramer joined. No luck, I found the episode summary but it didn't say anything about the club. So, I put in the DVD...and right as the DVD was loading to the menu screen, they answered.

"94.7 QDR! Do you know what club Kramer joined?"

"Ummm...no, actually I have no idea."

"So, why did you call in?"

"I got nothin'."

[laugh] "Thanks for calling."

Crap.

Since it's possible that 3 people are reading this, I've decided I should become a more regular poster. That's easier said than done, but I'll give it a shot. The problem at this point is: I have absolutely nothing to blog about. Not that there aren't options - it looks like Dick Cheney just shot someone, the Winter Olympics are well underway, the entire muslim world is ticked about a cartoon, people keep burning churches down, and there's a huge blizzard in the northeast.

With that said, we went skiing this weekend with the youth group. It was fun times had by almost all except for the Rwandan kids who had never seen snow before and don't speak English. The language barrier definitely affected the attempted teaching by the ski instructors, Kim and I, and everyone else in the group that was trying to help them have a good time. However, it was a great time, and for JT's amusement I'm posting these pictures.


Well, I best get back to studying the law. It may come in handy some day.

UNC lost last night, I'm disappointed because beating Duke is always fun, but at the same time, I really don't care because, in case you haven't heard, THE STEELERS WON THE SUPER BOWL! It wasn't a pretty game to watch and neither team played well, but who cares, the Steelers won.

Wow, short post.